Before It's Too Late

At the present time there are 5.3 million people in the U.S. living with Alzheimer's, and by 2010 nearly half a million new cases will be added each year. Data indicate that 70% of Alzheimer's patients are cared for at home. Current studies of Alzheimer's raise the possibility that early life traumas may be influential in the development of the disease. There is evidence that chronic psychological stress is associated with a nearly three fold increased risk of the illness. Family members and caregivers of Alzheimer's patients, health professionals, and all who are concerned about the dramatic increase of the illness are interested in information which brings a greater depth to understanding those afflicted with Alzheimer's. This book is autobiographical, and thus becomes an Alzheimer's story. It is the story of an emotionally isolated childhood, an unproductive education, and an unhappy first marriage. My deliverance came in the sustaining love of a second marriage and a rewarding life with my psychiatrist husband. But now I have an illness that threatens the life restored and attempts to pummel me back into the depths of those earlier years. Since the onset of Alzheimer's six years ago, the memories of my early years now return not just as thoughts but as feelings, and they leave a defining imprint on the symptoms of my Alzheimer's. These symptoms include unreasoned resentment, desperate feelings of isolation, periods of profound embarrassment and humiliation, inexplicable and uncontrollable anger, recurring perceptions of personal guilt and inadequacy. All of these currently darken my days and threaten my desire to live. These are the same emotions that colored the earlier years of my life. Now the raging emotions return, and the emotional incontinence of Alzheimer's puts my peace, my love, indeed my life once again in jeopardy.